I’m not typically a “wear my favorite player’s jersey” guy. But when the Bills unveiled their new/old look, I wanted in.
Here’s the problem… you can’t buy a blank football jersey. Even if you could do it, you’d look like a player doing a non-sanctioned commercial for a local auto dealership. So, it’s time to bet on a player and make a commitment.
In rationalizing the purchase, I immediately had to violate self-imposed rule #1:
- Don’t wear the jersey of a guy who is younger than you. It’s weird enough to walk around with somebody else’s name on your back like a high school girl wearing the star quarterback’s letterman jacket. At least if the athlete is older, there’s still an innocent, childlike element to the admiration. Steer clear of accidentally telling people “when I grow up, I want to be just like this guy who is 17 years younger than I am.”
At age 37, rule #1 put me in a tough spot but I managed to hold firm on the rest.
(To be clear, I’m not trying to tell you what to do. Make your own choices.)
The rest of my rules:
- Be a little creative. Don’t get something that 6 of the 10 guys at your tailgate party will be wearing.
- Don’t get cute/ironic. Your choice of Chidi Ahanotu made one person smile once. After that, nothing.
- Plan ahead. Try for a guy who is unlikely to be benched, cut, traded, or incarcerated in the near future.
- Consider body type– both his and yours. A 5’4″ adult male in a Tyler Myers jersey looks ridiculous. So does a 400 pounder crammed into a Roscoe Parrish uni. (There’s a part of me that thinks they should only sell jerseys in the size that the actual player wears, but that would eliminate kids… and, really, kids should be the ones wearing jerseys– not us. I mean, come on, what are we doing?)
Anyway, here’s where I wound up.
One year into owning a Marcell Dareus jersey, I’m very pleased with my selection.
After listening to the interview Dareus did with Howard Simon and Jeremy White this morning, I’m even happier.
So given as a family gift, that Thurmanator jersey is a go? “And you will sit and take it…and you will like it.”
I like all of your rules, but I don’t think you should give up on rule #1, no matter how hold you are. For me, the big fear is that your jersey person will either be traded away or will do something horrible to embarrass you. Therefore, you should only buy jerseys with retired, or better yet, deceased players’ names on it. For my money, Kent Hull’s 67 is a perfect choice for you Brad. He’s a big guy. He’s not going to be a Steeler or a Panther or a 49er next year. He’s not going to murder his wife and flee in a white Bronco. It’s why my Yankees’ jersey has Gehrig’s 4 on it. My Knicks’ jersey has Willis Reed’s 19.
Agree with you Brad–but also with Buffalonian–I have gotten many years out of my Hansen Jersey. Went with Dareus last year. I alternate. I bought my nephew a Dareus jersey last year when I saw him in a McGahee (OH no!).