The Bills have coined the new coaching staff as “The Dream Team.” Hmm. That comes across as kinda hokey. Then again, it’s OK to chase dreams, especially considering what we…

The Bills have coined the new coaching staff as “The Dream Team.”

Hmm.

That comes across as kinda hokey. Then again, it’s OK to chase dreams, especially considering what we had before – a guy who deemed it necessary to canonize himself in order to get the Bills into the postseason.

Dreams are good. Goals are good.

The players can buy into this. In the very least, they should be emboldened by a staff who sees a light at the end of a tunnel without the whole messiah complex thing.

Smart Thing 1: Everyone Is Going To Want To Play With Evander Kane

If you want to Google the timeline of off-ice issues of Evander Kane’s tenure in Winnipeg, you can do that. You can also try Google Images. Ogle the stacks of money on his back as he does his pushups. Marvel at his reverse engineered Motorola DynaTAC money brick phone.

Then, watch this.

Then, imagine what he will do here with Reinhart, Grigorenko, Girgensons, Ennis, and some guy named McEichel. Or better yet – McEichel aside – imagine what Kane could do on a line with Reinhart and Girgensons. Now, imagine a team trying to score against them.

If you’re not excited at this point, you may not have a heart beat.

Pegula and Ted Black wanted Buffalo to be a destination for hockey players. Currently, Buffalo is still demonized by players and their agents. But my money bricks are betting that changes very, very soon.

Smart Thing 2: Life Threatening Wind Chills Build Character And Ice Rainbows

Meteorologists have started naming winter storms. We’re all doomed, right? Nope. We’re close enough to Canada to know that cold and stillness begets beauty (see: beer).

See also: ice rainbows (this is actually something you really, really should Google).

Smart Thing Three: If You Don’t Want To Die Out There, Read This

February sucks. From Buffalo.edu (UB):

“Frostbite is an injury to the body that is caused by freezing. It results in a loss of feeling (numbness, tingling), aching and loss of color in the affected areas. It usually affects toes, fingers, nose, ears, cheeks and chin. It can permanently damage body tissues and in severe cases may lead to the need for amputation. Never rub an area of the body that may have frostbite, as that may cause skin damage.”

As much as we like to joke about it, winter is serious business, especially for those who are elderly, young, or sick or mentally ill. Click the link above, and keep your family prepared.

 

Smart Thing Honorable Mentions/Tweet Roll: The giant Labatt six pack should be a trophy. Who do we contact to get championship winning names inscribed on this thing?

“Alex the Great” went through an awful lot to wear a sombrero in front of us. Respect.

Honestly, this just makes me feel cold, but so long as the tourists are buying it, we’re in good shape.

One of my favorite new followers on Twitter tweeted something favorable:

Time to abandon ship and get on board with the tankers. Feel free to argue about that if you’d rather be a fan of the middling/dystopian Leafs right now.

Good luck with the final 20 or so games left Sabres. Can’t wait to see you next season.

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Note: Questions? Comments? Have a Smart Thing? You can find Scott Michalak shoveling snow off of his roof  at @ScottyMCSS.

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