Smart thing 1: “Buffalo News Comments”
“(It) is the greatest thing ever, but it also gives me uncontrollable rage storms on occasion.” – “The Scizz,”July 26, 2012.
Got your attention? Good. Read on.
Have you ever scrolled down to the comments section after reading a story over at the Buffalo News? If you’ve done so, and immediately afterwards felt that you needed a heavy dose of mind bleach, then you’re not alone.
The News’ comments section is home to some of the smartest rebuttals and opinions on the news… some of them. Mostly, it’s a collection of priceless half-witted tantrums. And it is Internet GOLD.
Finally, someone has built a mine for all that gold. Ladies and gentlemen, let me talking-proudly introduce to you to “Buffalo News Comments.” This is a new Tumblr (sort of like a blog, but based on pictures) of the best of the worst that News readers have to offer. You can find the tumbly-blog here, and follow the author on Twitter at @BuffaloNewsComment.
Enjoy the laughs.
And the rage storms.
Smart thing 2: The Webster Block
Finally, the City of Buffalo has offered up a piece of land that preservationists/obstructionists cannot possibly protest… a parking lot. Maybe we’ll see one crazy guy with a placard insisting that “William McKinley Once Admired our Architecture Here.”
Still, “Occupy Buffalo” (motto: “We are [sort of] Many!”) could possibly bang their bongos against these corporate elitist proposals. Let us not forget the fact that these pork barrel ideas are taking away yet another piece of land still flat enough in this town for their BYOB tent festivals. Fret not, Occupiers (Occupists? Occupi?) I hear no one is currently filming ghost hunting programs at the old Central Terminal. I dare you to occupy that place… for one night.
Meanwhile…
The proposals are rolling in, and they are lookin’ pretty good. I’m pretty keen on the Sabres’ proposal – but then again, do we really need a Buffalo Grill within earshot of the Pearl Street Grill? (Trust me, after [or before] a few arena beers, Sabres fans are pretty loud.)* Pegula, you can do better than that. Besides, we all know you probably want to call it “Gilbert’s Place” anyway.
*“Was that cookie monster,” you ask? Yes, at the :08 second mark. Don’t ask me to explain what this means though – it’s well beyond my Ted Blackian “Hockey IQ.”
Smart thing 3: Shawne Merriman Survives Day 1 of Training Camp (Subtitled, “Promptly Injures himself on Day 2.”)
Another day, another injury for the much-maligned Merriman, but his injury wasn’t serious. Said Coach Chan Gailey: “He couldn’t go (Saturday). He rolled an ankle yesterday late. He taped it up and finished, but we held him out today. He went through the walk throughs this morning so it’s not like it’s a hobbling thing. We’re going to make sure he’s ready to go before we bring him back.”
Must. Destroy. Brady.
The team is using the smartest approach possible here by not bringing Shawne back before he is 100%. Much of the team’s success this season will hinge on the effectiveness of that new and vastly-improved, NFL-elite pass rush. If you recall how jaw-droppingly dominant Merriman was in last year’s preseason, then you know how big this guy can be for the Bills season. Say a prayer, light a candle, meditate, drink a beer, or do whatever it is that you do to get the positive vibes going for this guy.
Stay healthy, boys. Oh, and for all of you media folks out there that think that it’s critically important to tweet every pass, hit, fumble, jock adjustment, or Gailey-lookin’-ornery moment of training camp – it isn’t. You’ve been spamming our otherwise spammed-by-the-#BillsMafia Twitter feeds. (And no one goes up against that mafia.)* Kindly share with us your wrap-ups at the conclusion of each day.
*Still, fist bump to the creators of the #BillsMafia for donating 100% of their store proceeds to the Roswell Park Cancer Institute. I know a lot of children that are very grateful for this.
***
- Note: “3 Smartest Things” is being produced to go along with the “5 Dumbest Things” series here on TB. “Why three,” you ask? Well – far be it from me to break our time honored tradition of berating each other on the progress of our fair Queen City. Tell you what, when the new Peace Bridge goes up, we’ll go up to five. And of course, feel free to follow me on Twitter to discuss all things trending in Buffalo, and check out my blog “Buffalo Sabres Nation” when you’re bored at work. Your boss will appreciate your increased productivity afterwards.
- Note to Larry Korab (of “5 Dumbest”): couldn’t help but notice your lack of “Smartest Things” smack-talk in your latest column. Geez. I hope I didn’t scare you with my Korab-jab last week. I promise, I won’t send the #BillsMafia after you. Still buds?
